i've been really irritable for days. i am just barely functioning in public without having a melt down. shopping is always a nightmare anyway, because it's always crowded everyone in this f~ing town. i have been cursing pretty much non stop, and feel like trashing something. i took my revenge on this big bag of kitty litter, stabbing it instead of trying to pull the stupid string thing that never works. i have such anger and animosity and resentment. fuck i hate my life so much. to feel so moody all the time makes me miserable. i bought a bunch of candy to drown my sorrows. and two bags of fudge brownies and potato chips and marshmallow pies and pudding. good thing i don't drink that much or i would so be an alcoholic for sure.
just wanted to note that when i was looking at the word alone, i heard the same exact word at the same time on tv. so here are some of the words i am trying to remember that this has happened to me.
alone spirit Sandi
curse angel individual
i forget what else. i try and write some of it down on facebook too.
maybe God is telling me to not let being alone be such a curse to me. i don't know
but i do know i get spiritual messages from i don't know who!!!!! why don't u just tell me what u are trying to say to me, Universe???